I guess I've to accept the fact that sometime no matter how well or good you treat someone, they will never treat you the same. Yes, I've that happening to me all the time from strangers to close friends. What disappoint me the most was my good friends backstab me too. Sometimes I just get too tired of treating people good because what I got back was otherwise. I hate the fact that some people treat me like shit, backstab me etc but when need something, they will think of me and I've to pretend that nothing had ever happen before. Thanks for training me that, now I'm good at pretending. No matter how much I tried, it's never good enough. I hate the fact that no matter how bad or how shitty one treated me, I will still treat them good. I just can't bring myself to treat people bad and shitty. I hate the fact that some people get close to me because of some motive. I hate the fact that people are trying to bring me down.
Poly life gave me a fresh start. At least I met people who's fun, loving and caring. People who make friend with me without any motive. People whom I can pour everything to without being judge or backstab as everyone is mature enough. People who don't think of bringing me down. Sometimes I don't get it what some people will benefits after bringing me down. I mean like, I don't have good fame or whatsoever there's no point bringing me down. Or maybe I should make a change... a change that start from me. I should start treating people bad in order for people to treat me good. HA HA HA joke, I don't even know how to treat someone bad.
---
Please, just spare me from these shit. Sometimes I'm wondering, does treating people bad will make them treat you good?
